Scotland, quick update

I only have a second.  I am at an internet cafe and need to run soon. 

 

Choose the second dress and won rave reviews.  When I return home, I will try to post a photo.  I was called a statue by the groom, which I took as a compliment.  More details about the wedding soon!!

Mental update

I have been on my meds now for about 2 months.  Maybe a bit more than that, but everything is so amazingly different.  I know I gave an update earlier about the change after 4 weeks and that was truly life-changing.

Now though is different, now I am at a stable dose and a stable feeling about life.  I still get concerned and anxious about stuff, like the fact that I am not working yet, but I don't have a complete and utter breakdown about it. 

We had brunch with some very good friends a few weeks ago and she has been through all of the 'issues' with me for years.  I love these friends, they are incredibly important to us.  They have had to deal with our infertility and everything else in our lives for such a long time, and they don't complain or make anything any harder on me.  She works really hard to try to relieve some of the pressure through little things, like an incredible sense of humor or stories about her own family stuff.  Over brunch we were all laughing so hard about some stories that we were talking about, and I thought she was going to cry, she was laughing so hard.  It dawned on me then that I couldn't remember the last time I had laughed that hard about anything. 

We just talked the other day and mentioned that morning, she said that she was so happy that I seemed to be in such a better place.  Her husband even said in the car on the way home, that it was nice to have me back.  I try to hide as much of the depression from people as I can but I know now how bleak a place I was in.  I am a completely different person to myself and the people I love when I am deep into depair. 

I am a person I even like now.  I wasn't someone I liked then.  I wasn't even someone I could see then.  It is like I am a completely new person now that the medicine is a part of my life.  Thank god, or whoever.

More shopping!

Ok, this time, I haven't bought anything but it is only a matter of time I would guess.

First up, the final product of the dress for our anniversary. This didn't include any jewelry or anything and I ended up wearing my hair in a long pony-tail, but I think you get the idea.





















Now on to the shopping! I am looking for a dress for a wedding in two weeks. I put these two on hold till Saturday and H has seen the pix. He likes the first one and so do I. It is the more expensive of the 2 but we both like it. I think it looks more 'movie-star' which is always a good goal. The second one I think looks more elegant. It is navy and silver which is really pretty. My camera battery was low and so I had to turn off the flash. Unfortunately that means that the aperture was open and I am not real steady so these are pretty shaky. Sorry. I am going to go back tomorrow and show H, so maybe he can take a better photo.




































This one, I just couldn't help myself. I was around the first time this was 'popular'. This just made me laugh so much that I had to take a photo. Do you remember when Madonna wore something just like this in that terrible Susan movie? I do realize how ridiculous this looks, but you have to laugh. I have lived through the 80s three times now!!

Quick update

Ok, a quick update on acupuncture. 

To preface it, I was/am very skeptical about acupuncture and similar treatments.  I have a scientific background and am generally a logical person, which is why I did end up going to acupuncture.  I looked at quite a few journal article in Fertility and Sterility and found that the scientific evidence is pretty good.  Nowhere is there any sort of explanation as to why it might work but the evidence suggests it does.

That being said, one is supposed to 'relax' (hhmmmm, where have we heard that before??), and I hadn't gotten that reaction yet.  After one session, they added massage to the treatment and let me tell you that was the most painful massage ever.  I have some nerve damage in my arms from previous surgeries and so certain areas are extra sensitive.  I thought I was going to cry, but I let him do what he was going to do.  As I said to H, injecting all the meds hurts too, but we don't balk at that.

My lower back was killing me the next couple of days too, but anyway.  The following week, massage came first and it really did help me to relax.  I might even have dozed off for a minute or two during the puncturing, which to me is kinda amazing.

The woman said that this treatment was to 'bring on my period' which I just shrugged at since I have been 5-7 days late the last few months.  She put a few extra needles in and asked me to her when there was shocking pain.  There was! 

The following day I began to spot.  Weird.  Today seems to be day 1, which is 1 day late.  To me that is a huge difference from 5-7 days late, so I am impressed.  They also told me to avoid very cold things during this time, but have they seen the weather!?!  Ice cream is a requirement.  I will see what I can do, but I can't promise anything.

Oh, and I wore the dress for our 3-year anniversary the other night.  I will post the 'final product' pictures as soon as I get them loaded.

Some recommendations:

We just saw a movie the other night that I definitely recommend.  It is called "Kiss Kiss Bang Bang" and it has Robert Downey Jr and Val Kilmer.  It is sort of an old fashioned noir mystery and it has a great sense of humor.  It came out last year sometime, but was marketed terribly. 

Also, just started "Cell" by Stephen King.  Very quick read and compelling in an apocolyptic way. 

Just some summer time things to think about.

Latest purchase

Ok, so here is the dress. I like the concept and the price (27$!) but I am not sure of the fit for me. The camera angle is a bit low so I feel like it might not be the most 'flattering'. I don't know how flattering the dress is in general, but it certainly is comfy. Please be as honest!!

Here you go: