Friday, July 14, 2006

Oh, and the dreams

One of the problems with the sleep disturbances are that I am having really vivid dreams. The dr says this is normal with this med and most people end up being fine with them. Well, since I am sleeping so lightly these dreams are sort of keeping me awake. Hopefully I will get used to this routine and be able to ignore them soon, but the most recent was a doozy.

I had an appointment with the dr for meds last week and wanted to discuss some research I had done on the subject. The night before I had a fully REAL dream, you know the kind where you feel awake and active through the whole thing?? Well, that dream was that I had a baby, that minute. I hadn't been pregnant, but I went into labor and had a baby. I felt terrible because I was in labor and couldn't call to cancel my appointment with happy-med lady.

Yes, this was my major concern. But also when I looked at the baby, she (yep, girl) was very dark, hair and skin. H is darker than I am, but since I am the color of fish-bellies, that isn't that tough. My first thought was that everyone would know that she was from a donor egg. It was crushing though I was still happy, it was very bitter-sweet.

I don't know if this means I am becoming alright with the donor egg concept or not. Or if my body is telling me that is the only path for us. I don't really know what to think, other than I have a fear of breaking appointments.


J Fife said...

I know nothing about dream analysis, but I had to laugh. I often also get stressed in my dreams over small anal things and completely overlook the larger, more serious happenings. Hope you get some restful sleep soon...

Rebecca said...

It sounds like you've had a lot going on these past couple of weeks. Mood stabilizers can definitely cause sleep issues. I've found that CDs that walk me through deep breathing and muscle relaxing exercises help a bit. I hope you're able to get better sleep soon.

Anonymous said...

What a great site
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